[Trombone-l] Tom Ervin and the talking metronome

[Ray Horton]

Hey Tom Ervin!


Did the "Talking Metronome" story start with you? I had not heard of it, 
but after I took one week off (Sunday, Dec 28) from my Minister of Music 
duties at my church, I came back and saw that my pastor had used your 
name in her sermon! I googled the story and it seems to have gathered a 
life of it's own, with and (mostly) without your name attached.


Here is the version that my pastor used:

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Tom Ervin, Professor of Music at the University of Arizona attended a 
conference for music teachers in New York. He purchased a talking 
metronome at the display area of the conference. (A metronome is a 
device for counting the beats in a song.) On the way home from LaGuardia 
Tom and his son hefted his carry-on bag onto the security-check conveyor 
belt.


The security guard's eyes widened as he watched the monitor and he asked 
Tom about the bag’s contents. Then the guard slowly pulled out of the 
bag a strange looking device, a six-by-three-inch black box covered with 
dials and switches. Other travelers, sensing trouble, vacated the area.


“It's a metronome," Tom replied weakly. His son cringed in 
embarrassment. “It's a talking metronome," he insisted. “Look, I'll show 
you." He took the box and flipped a switch, realizing that he had no 
idea how it worked. “One . . . two . . . three . . . four," said the 
metronome in perfect time. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.


As they gathered their belongings, Tom's son whispered, “Aren't you glad 
it didn't go 'four . . . three . . . two . . . one . . . '?"
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Raymond Horton
Minister of Music
Edwardsville (IN) United Methodist Church